I’m not ready.

Standard

I mean, she’s only eight.

Do girls really start asking “questions” at this age?

It’s the t.v.’s fault is what it is.

And my stupid fault too.

Last night, we were watching a program and a couple was kissing.

(not french kissing…church kissing…name that movie!)

And M’Kayla says: “ewww!!! Now their gonna have BABIES!!! Ewwww!”

To which, stupid me…before I could stop the words…says:  “Sis, don’t be silly, you can’t have a baby from kissing!”

(Why yes…I did want to punch myself in the mouth the moment I uttered those words…why do you ask?)

And just because He has a sense of humor, and likes to watch me squirm….God chose that moment to instruct the powers that be in t.v. land to play the commercial that talks about talking to your kids about sex. Which happened to play the instant I utter the words (because I obviously am stuck now…must. go. on.)  “You have to BE MARRIED and have sex to have babies.”

She looks at me.

She looks at the commercial.

She looks at me.

She looks at the commercial.

I try to hide.

She looks at me.

She looks at the commercial.

I freeze.

She looks at me like this:

And whispers: “mom….what is sex?”

I.

want.

to.

die.

now.

I said: “uuuummmm…it’s…ahhh…ummmm…it’s…”

while frantically scanning the room for a way out of this.

Surely there must be some crisis that needs my attention!

Unfortunately, I had cleaned the living room to a spot free shine that afternoon and there wasn’t a single thing out of place that needed my attention.

dangit!

Just then, I look over and behold my baby….all five years old of him….smiling at me and offering me a hot wheels car.

I hear him say…in slow motion, because at this point everything is crawling….”Mommy…want to play hot wheels wif me?”

Oh boy do I ever!!!!!!

I look at my daughter..who is still looking at me like she was a second ago…and say “Honey, we’ll talk about this later…we can’t discuss it with Ricky in the room…okay?”

I didn’t wait to hear her response….I was outta there like money in my wallet.

Now I’m askeered.

She has forgotten for now…but I know it’s only a matter of time before that ill-timed commercial plays again…or she sees a couple kissing…or sees a baby…those sucker are everywhere.

For Pete’s sake..her teacher is expecting!!!!

I’m just not ready.

She is still a little girl.

She doesn’t need to be concerned with the goings on of adults.

Nor does she need to concern herself with “woman” things.

Problem is, she’s swiftly approaching the age when all of those things will, in fact, be relevant to her.

All too soon, adult subjects and concerns will invade her little world.

And I know she will need me to be there to hold her hand and help her wade through the deep well of woman-ness.

Problem is…I’m just not ready.

Guess I need to get that way.

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One response »

  1. I was not ready either when you went through all of that with me…however, you were not 8 either. I think you were closer to 13 or so. Times, they are achangin’. Great books are out there, and there is always a “we will talk about this when you are 30”. 🙂
    Wish I could offer you some sage advice, but as you can tell by your sister, I messed that up too! So, I will be here if you need me, but don’t expect much…cuz I ain’t got it! 😦

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